She's Out of My League ...

"I hate her. In fact, the day you broke up with her I marked that down on my calendar as a day of rejoicement. I'm going to celebrate it with a cake with her face on it, but instead of eating it, we smash it." - She's Out of My League

"Jack: You're a moodle.
Kirk: A moodle?
Jack: A man poodle. Girls, they wanna take you out on a walk. They wanna feed you, they wanna cuddle you, but make no mistake, no girl wants to do the moodle." - She's Out of My League

"You have a choice. You can step aside. Or you can fight me. If that is how you want to go, I warn you, I will go dark side. Okay? I will rip out your hair. I will bite your chin off. And I will stab you in the eyes with confiscated scissors. Because I'm an insane mother fucker." - She's Out of My League